A Lynx in Their Den [Shifting Desires 1] (Siren Publishing Ménage Everlasting) Read online

  She noted that there was a small stove behind the bar as well as cabinets that would hold snacks and dishes. The door off to the side looked ordinary and simple, but when Creed opened it and stepped back for her to enter first, Serenity realized that nothing simple or mundane lay behind it.

  Inside the room she found a massive bed that had to have been special ordered. She imagined the sheets for it would be several hundred dollars easy. On either side stood bedside tables of sturdy oak. A massive dresser with a full mirror took up on entire wall and two matching chest of drawers stood on either side of another door on another wall. All of the furniture looked well-made and overly large. But then the two male shifters standing next to her were overly large bears.

  “This is lovely,” she finally managed to get out.

  “It’s too small for us, but we can make it work until our suite is ready,” Creed told her.

  “We aren’t pompous or egotistical that we have to have the biggest and best just because we are the sleuth’s leaders,” Shayne said. “But we are big and need more room than this offers. When we move out, it will be enlarged.”

  “It’s big to me, but then I’m not as big as the two of you and the furniture is larger than normal.” Serenity figured she would need a stool to climb up on the bed as it was.

  “If you don’t like anything, we can change it. We want you to be comfortable and happy, Serenity,” Shayne told her, his mouth not far from her ear at all. In fact, she could feel his hot breath fanning across her earlobe and neck.

  “I love the furniture.” Serenity didn’t want them to think she was materialistic or anything. She wasn’t.

  “The bathroom is in here. We’ll have a larger shower once our space is complete. There isn’t enough room for large males in this house,” Creed said as he showed her the bathroom.

  To Serenity it was very nice, but would certainly be uncomfortable to a shifter the size of all the males she’d seen so far. She didn’t blame them for wanting something bigger. Maybe she could talk them into letting her help with the bathroom design. She really wanted her spa.

  “We don’t have a very large closet in here, but that will change. I think we can make do until then,” Creed was telling her as he led her back out of the bathroom to the only other door.

  She didn’t have that many clothes so she couldn’t imagine needing much room. When he showed her the space she nearly laughed. It was the same size as her walk-in closet next door and she barely had anything in it. What size did they think she needed? Where they clothes horses?

  “I know it’s not large, but…” Shayne began, but she quickly stopped him with a finger to his lips.

  “It’s plenty big enough unless you and your brother have more clothes than I do. I can’t fill up even half of it.” Both of the shifters frowned at her.

  “We will take you shopping as soon as things settle down. There’s no need for you not to have enough clothes to be comfortable,” Creed said.

  A broad smile took over her face at the thought of the two shifters following her around from store to store as she shopped. Equally funny was the thought of her doing any marathon shopping in the first place. Serenity wasn’t one to shop for no real reason.

  “I can afford anything I want, guys. I make very good money with my business, but I don’t need a lot.” She didn’t want to give them the impression that she didn’t appreciate their offer, but neither did she want them to think she was poor and unable to keep herself in clothes either.

  “Then you should use your money for things you want from now on. We will take care of you as is our privilege and duty,” Creed said formally.

  “Besides, we’re going to enjoy spoiling you like you deserve,” Shayne added with a mischievous wink.

  “Um, if you want to spoil me, can I help design the bathroom? I really want a spa. I’ve been putting it off for years because I didn’t want a lot of people in and out of my house. I have everything already planned out and even have some of it already bought, stored at my house.”

  Creed smiled, his face appearing more relaxed than she’d seen it so far. She liked the tiny laugh lines at the corners of his eyes. They didn’t add age to his handsome face but character, making him seem much more approachable. Her heart fluttered at the way his smile brightened his entire face. She liked seeing this side of him and hoped to see it more once they became more familiar with each other.

  “You can make whatever changes you want to, honey. Like Shayne said. We want you to be happy and feel safe here.” Creed kissed the top of her head before pulling her closer to him, encircling her in his arms. “Maybe let us check the dimensions to be sure it is large enough for our big bodies if you don’t mind.”

  She grinned up at him. “Of course. I’m sure we will need to add a foot or two so you won’t feel claustrophobic, but I already had it quite large. I wanted to be able to spread my arms in it if I wanted to. Oh, and I wanted multiple shower heads, too.”

  “I’m already in love with it, and I haven’t even seen the designs yet,” Shayne chuckled.

  “I’m in love with you, Serenity. You’ve made me and Brother Bear very happy. We’ve been searching for you for what seems like forever. I never dreamed we’d find you as soon as we moved in here. I’ve never felt so at peace before.” Creed hugged her, barely squeezing her against his big body as if afraid of hurting her.

  Serenity wrapped her arms around him to the best of her ability and squeezed him back, making no attempt at being careful not to hurt him. He was a big bear shifter. He could handle it. When he didn’t even grunt, she pouted to herself. She wasn’t in the same league when it came to his sort of brute strength. She’d have to work out more and build some strength. She was sure the guys would continue to treat her with kid gloves, but she wanted them to feel comfortable being themselves around her. That wouldn’t happen if they perceived her to be weak.

  “You smell sweet, like honey. I wonder if you’ll taste like red clover or honeysuckle,” Creed said with his nose buried against her neck. He licked her there, sending tingles along her skin. “Mmmm, even better. You taste like warm sunshine on a fresh honeycomb. I’m going to eat you alive, precious.”

  Another hot body pressed against her back and Shayne’s tongue stroked the length of her neck without stopping until he reached her ear. There he sucked in her earlobe and nipped it before releasing it with an audible pop. She didn’t even try to suppress the shivers it caused. The low moan she heard turned out to have come from her. How could they do this to her when she didn’t even know them that well? It was too soon to be so attracted to them, wasn’t it?

  “She has on too many clothes, brother.” Shayne’s voice had sunk an octave at least. The effect that alone had on her seemed criminal.

  “Clothes?” she managed to get out.

  “Yes. Too many of them,” Creed agreed. He started pulling her T-shirt up over her head and Serenity was too stunned to do anything other than lift her arms.

  Shayne’s warm hands wrapped around her waist over bare skin while Creed’s massive hands cupped her still covered breasts in his. She hated that she was wearing plain cotton underwear, but she’d never worried that anyone would see her in them before. Of course she’d never expected to end up with a mate either. Now she had two of them.

  Suddenly all of her long buried fears and insecurities surfaced to cut off her ability to breathe. She grabbed for her throat, certain that she would suffocate, but Creed seemed to understand what was going on. He lifted his hands to cup her face and stared into her eyes.

  “Breathe, little kitten. It’s okay. No one will ever hurt you. You’re safe.”

  Well, he understood that she had panicked and lost her breathe though not the reason behind it. She wasn’t afraid that they would harm her. She knew better. Neither brother would ever do anything to hurt her if they could help it. She also knew that they would sacrifice their very lives to keep her safe from any threat, but what she was afraid of couldn’t be fought in on
e of the shifter’s two forms. It had to be fought in her head and in her heart. She may end up fighting with them to keep her freedom, but it was something Serenity didn’t think she could survive without. That worried her far more than any outside threat ever would.

  * * * *

  Creed’s bear roared in his head. Their mate was afraid. It was their job to make her feel safe. The fact that she had just met them that morning didn’t seem to matter to Brother Bear. He expected to be able to comfort and soothe her just by who he was to her. Creed didn’t like her anxiety any more than his bear did. She’d been fine despite the threat earlier. Why did she suddenly close down?

  He glanced over at his brother to find his face pale and a look of despair fighting to disrupt his normally easy going smile. It dawned on him then that it wasn’t that she was afraid that they couldn’t keep her safe. She was afraid of them for some reason. What had they done to spook her? Surely what they’d said over the last few minutes hadn’t upset her. She’d seemed pretty turned on. Shifters were very sexual animals and his bear was about to die to make her theirs.

  “Serenity,” he began. “You know we’d never hurt you. No matter how badly we want you.”

  “Need you,” Shayne interrupted him, taking a step back.

  “We’d never hurt you. I thought you understood that, honey.” Creed watched her face warm to a soft pink as her eyes widened for an instant before she dropped them to look at her feet.

  “I’m not afraid of you. It’s not that. I’m afraid of me. It’s why I left my den in the first place. I need freedom and mating meant losing that freedom. My lynx is clawing at me to run as fast as we can, but we both know that it’s too late. We’ve already started bonding and running away now would only send her into a tailspin.”

  Creed’s stomach made a nosedive to his feet as his heart cramped at her words. Even knowing they were mates, she still would rather not be with them. It hurt far more than he’d thought it would. He’d always known that when they found their destined mate they would all have to adjust and grow into love with each other over time, but it had never occurred to him that their mate might not want that for herself. It was obvious she viewed it as something she had to learn to live with and not as something to anticipate as he and Shayne had for the last eight or ten years.

  “What kind of freedom are you losing that scares you so much? Are you saying you don’t want to settle down with just the two of us in your bed?” Shayne asked his voice gravely as his bear fought him. “I can handle a lot of things, Serenity, but I won’t share with anyone but my brother.”

  Creed hadn’t even thought of it in those terms before. They were very sexual beings with urges that were tied to every strong emotion from extreme anger to pure happiness. He would kill anyone who touched her. Even now, before they’d sealed their bond and joined their scents, Creed knew that he would destroy anyone who attempted to take her from them in any way.

  “Ours!” he roared.

  Serenity took a step back, her pupils dilating even as her fangs lengthened so that they showed between her parted lips. His brother had taken a step closer to her baring his teeth as he breathed in the air between them.

  Fuck! This is going to end badly if I don’t rein in my bear. Shayne asking if our mate wanted others in her bed has Brother Bear riled to the breaking point. I don’t understand what she wants, though.

  “That isssn’t it,” she hissed out. Her eyes shifted back and forth between them.

  “Then what are you afraid you’ll lose?” Creed demanded.

  She drew in a deep breath and closed her eyes as if she were trying to put her fears into words. They came out stilted and choppy, but she managed to get them out without snarling any longer.

  “I’m a cat. I don’t like being confined or told what to do. I make my own decisions, and I have a very good business that I love. I’m not giving any of it up. It means we’ll fight and there are two of you. If you smother me, I’ll go crazy and end up being dangerous. I can’t live like that. The more you confine me, the worse I’ll get,” she said. When she opened her eyes, they shown and sparkled with tears instead of the merriment he would have preferred to see there. “I’m already drawn to both of you despite how hard I’ve fought this. I’ve been fighting to be free my entire life, Creed. You have no idea what it’s like for a female to lose herself beneath a male’s wishes and demands. I’ve seen it felt it to some extent outside of the mating bond. That small glimpse was enough to give me the strength to break the den bond and leave. I wasn’t closed off from them. I tore away from them.”

  Creed knew exactly what she was saying. It floored him. Pulling loose from a bond, whether it was from a pack, a den, or a sleuth was almost unheard of. Normally when someone wanted to leave the Ursus, or a pack alpha would lift or cut the bond so the shifter could join another group or go off to form their own in the case of many strong shifters. It was essentially what had happened with him, Shayne, and the others. His father had dropped the preternatural tether that linked all members of a shifter group to the leader and Creed had easily latched on to the bears who’d chosen to come with him.

  It had been simple for him and Shayne, but for most shifters, it was a little devastating even when they knew they were joining another group. To have actively broken that link, that phantom rope that secured her to her den for safety and balance had to have been extremely painful and frightening. And the little lynx had done it all alone.

  And still he wasn’t sure he completely understood why. She talked about freedom and independence as if she had none once she was mated, when in reality, she had even more with her mate’s protection in place. She wouldn’t need to ask permission from the leader just to leave their territory for mundane shopping trips or a quick visit with friends or family. With the mating bond in place, her mate would always know where she was and if there was trouble. It was a different type of bond than the one that connected her with a group’s leader, stronger and more comprehensive.

  “Are you saying you thought you would have even less freedom once you were mated? Why would you think that? Did someone tell you about the mating bond or did you just watch when someone bonded with their other half?” he asked.

  His brother gently took her hand and led her over to the chair and pulled her down onto his lap, gently gliding his hands up and down her arms without holding her in place as if she were a prisoner. Shayne was giving her as much room as possible while still touching and offering her comfort. It was one of the things his sibling was good at and was one of the reasons sharing a mate would work so well for them. When Creed wasn’t able to give their mate what she needed because of duties or the need to protect his sleuth, Shayne could without compromising his status in the sleuth.

  “Both and more,” she said so softly even his bear had to strain to hear her.

  “What do you mean, baby?” Shayne asked.

  “You really don’t know how it is for the females in a shifter family, do you?” she asked, her mouth curling up into a sneer. “Once we reach the age to potentially mate, we’re closely guarded. The males in the family won’t allow any other males near us. We’re watched all the time and never get to do anything outside of school. We can’t even be a part of any of the usual activities like drama club or the debate team. I wanted to go to college, but that was out of the question.”

  “How old do they consider you old enough to mate?” Creed asked, his voice snarly, but he couldn’t help it. Females in their sleuth weren’t treated like this. Were they? He looked at his brother but Shayne wasn’t looking at him.

  “Fourteen unless we are small, then fifteen,” she told him.

  “They don’t actually let a mate claim you at that age, do they?” he asked, astonished at how young it was.

  “It’s rare that a true mate is in the same den or a den close enough that they recognize each other at that age, but it does happen. In that case, if the female is under sixteen, the male will either return on her sixteenth birthd
ay or move in with her family to be near her until she is sixteen. Then she is his to claim.”

  Creed shook his head. “That isn’t how it is with the shifters I know. It certainly isn’t like that in my home sleuth or how it will be in this one. Females need to develop and mature so that they are able to handle an adult male. We’re aggressive and short tempered at times. It is through the mating bond that we are able to control ourselves better, siphoning off our female’s calmer nature.”

  “It’s all I know. My family was much more lenient than a lot of the ones in our den, but even they refused to allow me the freedom I craved. They did stand up to our leader and refuse to allow him to mate me off at a young age. If no true mate happened along to claim a female once they turned seventeen or eighteen, he started picking males for them and made them accept his choices. He wanted more cubs in the den since there were fewer than normal. I think it was because he forced matings when they didn’t belong together.” Her eyes glistened but still she didn’t allow the tears to fall.

  “Unless a female is too wild to control and her safety or the safety of the sleuth is at stake, we don’t force matings and we never force them between couples who don’t already care about each other,” Creed told her with a shake of his head.

  “He forced my best friend to mate with a relative of his from a different den. She wasn’t far away from us at all, maybe an hour north, but she was never allowed to return to even visit her parents. When I left the den, I went to see her before I moved on. She wasn’t herself. She’d lost so much weight she looked like a one of those starving kids you see on TV, and her eyes were so dull and lifeless looking. She’d had two miscarriages and her mate had beaten her when she’d lost the second kit. I begged her to go with me, but she was afraid of him and said he’d imprinted on her so closely that if she even thought about leaving he knew it. She didn’t think she would survive more than a few days outside of the den without him. I don’t want that. I don’t want my life so closely tied to someone else’s that I can’t have my own thoughts.”